almost finished

It was a long ride home. There was a tornado drill at Denver when we all went and stood in a restroom when a tornado was sighted. Everyone got back off the planes (gee, you would think they could do that for other delays - they CAN figure out a way to get you off the plane and back on) and got away from the windows and into a restroom. It was very weird to see the sole man that stood in the women's room and did not cross the hall to stand in the men's room.

I had taken knitting to St. Louis but did not knit more than a half row at a time, so I gave up. On the trip home, I decided I should knit, so I did, for 9 hours. Sunday I finished knitting, blocked the piece and wove in all the ends. It is a shrug pattern that promises to button up into a vest. I like to knit anything with yarnovers and cables. this is linen and mohair, and did block out softer than the knitted swatch.

It's good to be home

I had a drink with Lei in my ever-so-clean house, and went to bed early. We were all glad to be there.

Mother

sorry this has not been so interesting. Nothing interesting happens when one is in the ICU 12 hours a day. It was pretty tough to watch mother lay there motionless. Not too sure, it may be harder to watch her lay there and kick her feet and grimace. At least she is not pulling at the tubing so she doesn't have to be restrained. The old girl has a lot of fight in her, and it is for sure good exercise after laying there motionless. I'm sorry she is so agitated, but we can't keep her sedated until she is ready to get out of bed. It's going to break my heart to tell her I have to leave - she has no idea how long this has been, of course.

I was trying to let the tech get by me (it's a cosy room with all this stuff in here) and I closed my laptop screen onto my pen. Ooopsie. Now I have a striped screen with smears in the display. sorry boss.

OK, I am going on another little field trip to check out another nursing home. I need to run a few errands, and then I will come back here and sit. And knit. Or not.

Thursday, May 21

To reiterate, Agnes has her own blog now at http://gettingagneswell.blogspot.com/. This one is going back to being about me.

It is kind of a routine now, wake up with a start when the first photon slides through the drapes, make tea, feed the cats, get it together and try to watch the 30 mph speed limit as I drive through the residential streets to get here a little after 6. I hike up 2 stories of stairs and come to Mom's room, glancing at all the monitor readouts before I ever look at her sleeping in bed.


I arrange my stuff around my chair, fix the power cords so no one will trip, lock down the laptop and turn it on, go out and talk to the night nurse to find out if anything has changed. Time to rummage in the cabinet for teabags, see if any peanut butter has magically shown up, hike down 3 flights of stairs to the cafeteria in the basement to get a clean styro cup and straw, some milk and oatmeal. Today as I pay, the cashier asks me if I work here. No, I tell her, my mother is here, and she nods sadly. Back upstairs, wash my hands as I go back in her room, where I sit and chat with the day nurse, the respiratory therapist, the 4 docs and the cleaning lady as they pass through in turn. So here I sit, rummaging through e-mail and looking for applications to send to customers, leaving occasionally to hike the stairs for more hot water, washing my hands, and sitting.

I am hoping we can reduce the sedation after we get her ventilator fixed. I am anxious to do my real job here, patting and encouraging, opening cards and reading them to Mother, standing over her and smiling. This sitting stuff isn't much help.

Agnes has her own blog now

So that all the friends and family can keep up with Agnes we are going to post on her very own site. How 'bout that! if Agnes has ever heard the word blog, I'd be surprised, but she has one now! it is at http://gettingagneswell.blogspot.com/ Please bookmark and see you there.

Wednesday 20th

Still in a holding pattern. No change. I promise to make a round of phone calls when there is news. I don't expect anything to change before tomorrow. She is stable, her lab work and vital signs are good, her skin is holding up, and she is heavily sedated and as comfortable as we can keep her. Stay tuned and think positive.

supportive medical care

Agnes' medical team and I made some decisions today that we hope will enhance her chances for a full recovery. Agnes had a medical crisis that resulted in very major surgery to clean up after the infected gall bladder, and now she is very weak. It will be some time before her muscles are strong enough to breathe on her own, so we have made the decision to connect the ventilator directly to her trachea to make it easier to breathe and to allow her to remain on the ventilator until she is strong enough to comfortably breathe for herself. This will be a much more comfortable arrangement for her than to have the apparatus in her mouth and throat.

She is not doing well on the tube feeding. She is also having a line inserted into her artery so that she can continue on total parental nutrition. You don't want too much information here, but that should also make her more comfortable.

We hope these changes will make it possible for us to reduce the amount of sedation. She is otherwise stable, and when we see how she is doing with these changes, we can move Agnes to a setting that will allow rehabilitation while she is weaned off the ventilator. It will be a long recovery, but barring unforeseen circumstances, we still expect that to happen.

Please folks, she needs all the prayers and good thoughts to keep comin' her way.